Do you Communicate or do you have Conversations?

Do you Communicate or do you have Conversations?
This week I attending training … and one of the philosophies covered (sadly not in enough detail due to time constraints) was the difference between Communication vs Conversation. Something quite obvious when it was discussed but not something I had considered before.  When we talk to people, do we communicate to them or do we have a conversation with them?
What really resonated with me and indeed a few others in the group, was that it depends on the type of message we need to impart … are you delivering a decree which isn’t open to discussion or is the topic something that we can debate?  Hearing and encouraging each other’s views and opinions … and ultimately learning more about each other!
For me … Communication feels very one way and anyone who knows me, knows that conversation is so much more me … but I feel there is another side to this triangle of dialogue … was the message heard?  Do we hear what is being said?  And do we go beyond the words to hear what is being conveyed?
How often … and I know I am guilty of this … do we ask someone how they are and we don’t even bother to listen to the reply?  Or we politely settle for the obligatory “fine”.
Our lives are unachievably busy with so much jam-packed into 24 short hours … that this is the excuse not hearing has cultured.
Something I have also learned this week (maybe finally), is that emotion in a conversation doesn’t get you heard, it just gets you labelled.
It was a big bing bing moment for me and something that made me a bit sad … in this age of having every communication tool available at our finger tips … do we listen to each other … and are we indeed being heard?
What do you think?
Warm regards … Collette in Cape Town


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